“He seemed like such a nice young man,” says Mrs. Clenham as they pull another body out of the lime pit. “Quiet, polite, just kept to himself.”

“Which is why we called the police,” says Mr. Clenham.

“I’m not a freaking serial killer!” yells their struggling neighbor as the officers drag him to the car. “I hardly ever went into my back yard! I don’t even have a fence around it!”

“Have you heard the rumors that he removed his victims’ corneas?” says a titillated reporter.

“What a ghastly thing,” says Mrs. Clenham innocently. “I can’t imagine how those would taste.”