“It’s not just the pilot and the copilot,” cries the flight attendant. “The federal air marshall is bleeding to death, and the only doctor on the plane is on fire!”

Cath rises to her feet.

“The wings are coming off!” shrieks the pregnant mother. “And the F-14s behind us are still firing!”

Cath strides to the cockpit door.

“It’s too much,” cries a priest, tearing off his collar. “I can’t even bring myself to pray!”

“Everyone calm down!” Cath declares. “It’s going to be okay. I’m a sysadmin.”

That turns out to be very, very little help.

(But a little!)