“I should mention that Lord Vandernoot was not only my uncle… but indeed my father,” hisses Tania.

“Mine as well!” says Eurynome. “And what’s more, I am left-handed!”

“Really?” says Inspector Handsome, eyes alight.

“There’s just one thing you’ve forgotten!” shrills Mr. Spurlock, heaving up off the divan. “I’m ambidextrous, and I’m the only one who needed the money!”

“Please, Donny, we’re all mortgaged to the hilt,” says Tania.

“Fascinating,” says Inspector Handsome. “The only thing we haven’t considered is–”

“Look it is obviously me just GET OUT THE CUFFS ALREADY,” gasps the butler, erection wild in his shiny pants.