At Masticon University there’s Kerbico College, which has the Hackintooth Library, whose Portineau Rotunda holds the Ravelock Table, where the philosophers dine.

“Let’s have a revolution,” shouts Van Pil over spaghetti.

“Seconded!” says Guordon.

“Motion passes!” says Bahn. “Revolving what?”

“We hereby abolish the notion of property,” says Van Pil. “Own not, want not! Theft no crime! All university nonproperties are hereby siezed and donated back to the university by Phi Sigma Tau!”

“Tax writeoff!” The Philosophers cheer, and raise high their forks.

“Oop, that’s my fork,” says Guordon.

Van Pil harrumphs. “Again, all property–”

“Only,” nods Guordon, “it’s my fork.”