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Monthly Archives: May 2006

A few weeks after Asher moves into her own apartment, her father the philosophist moves everything he owns into the attic. Well, not everything–the folding ladder wouldn’t support the fridge–but he gets the couch up there. He insulates between the beams and hacks new vents into the central air. He rolls up the carpet. He puts lawn furniture on the roof. Asher, visiting, manages to work the conversation around to this behavior, and her father smiles and says Asher, you don’t see? It’s only up here, only when your feet don’t touch dirt that you can wrestle with

angels.

Lyle

When one of the plummeting cumulonimbi takes out Lyle’s house, he decides to just go with it. The insurance company won’t pay, but who needs them? Or their God? His shovel escaped unbroken, so he digs out a nice burrow: beanbag chairs in every room, and the nice thing about clouds is that your fridge can also be your window. Other people start to dig connecting burrows. Some of the people are girls.

Come spring the cloud will melt and this will be over, Lyle knows. But the beanbags are waterproof, and once the sky has fallen, it can’t fall again.

Kelsey

Kelsey Grammer is here to kill you.

“You know I’ve had a difficult life?” he asks, pouring you Evian from a carafe. “My father and sister were murdered, my brother killed by a shark.”

That’s rare.

“Went to jail, too.” Kelsey Grammer dabs his mouth with a napkin. “And my production of Macbeth, well…”

He pops the cap off a fountain pen, then drives it through your eye. Go ahead and collapse.

“But the murders,” murmurs Kelsey Grammer, deflecting a bullet with his fork. “They’ll change a man.”

“Drive him to vengeance,” confirms Maura Tierney, gun smoking sadly, watching you bleed.

Kettle

“I miss him,” says Kettle, teeth closed. “I just do and waking up is like putting my hand on a stove, every time.”

“I know,” says Ship. “We’re going to see the blues man.”

He leads her down around the light well until it bottoms out in mud. There are crickets and frogs here; it’s comfortably dim.

The blues man hangs davincied, hooks in his wrists and ankles. “Knife’s on the stump,” he murmurs.

Kettle trembles on her first cut; by her sixth she’s steady. She drops the knife, shuddering. The bleeding blues man breathes deep. Together, they begin to heal.

Bram

Three weddings that summer, and Penny and Bram are sitting at a reception table with “if we’re thirty-five and single, then” yelling in their ears. Bram looks at Penny. Penny looks at Bram.

Penny writes a prenup that will give back exactly what they put in; single dad Bram has five-year-old Zinnia give him away. They save some money on health insurance. Bram gets an apartment down the hall: Zinnia, it turns out, is Penny’s biggest fan.

When they go out, alone, they wear their bands on slender necklace chains. Neither pauses to consider the semiotics of that.

Nightjar

There are no shadows here on the Canvas, Killington told her, but when they make camp the blank whiteness of everything doesn’t keep her from falling asleep. When she wakes to darkness–thick, heavy, like grit on her tongue–she’s frightened. She can’t remember the last time she was scared of the dark. Actually, she can.

She fumbles in a bag and finds the striker he used to light the balloon. “Nightmare?” Killington mumbles, stirring. “Wait–don’t–”

She’s clicking it, and the flare of sparks traces them both in shadow. Gnomon is there, then, behind her. His cane is a sword.

Missed Connections

or was it too real for you? Message Box #43855.

A FRIEND IN NEED – I helped you look for your missing wallet last Wednesday at the St. Pancras stop. We never did find it, but I think we found something else to pursue. Drinks? My treat, of course. Message Box #99298.

WHITE KNIGHT – Wednesday, St. Pancras–I chased off the grotbag who was “helping” you at the station. I hope I’m not mistaken when I say there was gratitude in your lovely eyes. Let’s have a laugh over it together. Message Box #66728.

FORGIVE ME? I picked your pocket last Wednesday,

Lando

When the SoBaptCo and the Scientologists pool ammo and march on Rome, when the Swiss Guard arms its crossbows, nobody’s more surprised than Pope Lando III to see the Castell Crystal Healing Movement ring the Basilica–in defense.

“We’ve just said some awful things about each other,” explains the Pope in whatever language he speaks. Guaraní?

“We’re the only people who believe in artifacts anymore,” replies Castell himself. “Holy water, vibrating amethyst, tomato, tomato.” He says it with the long A both times. “Our concrete faith will save this city!”

“Foxhole egalitarians.” Lando smiles.

“Listen,” says Castell, “you bless Uzis, right?”

Chicago

Chicago doesn’t have the French for what she’s seeing, but she needs it. English isn’t concise enough: she’d have to list cogwheels and levers by name, belts and screws and mangles. There are wax cylinders and ribbon cables, great discs on arms and tiny hydraulic tubes, the hiss of steam and an electric hum. Some pieces are gleaming and some are shattered. None of it ever stops moving.

Not far above her are people, cars and the lazy downtown sun: Chicago sees the arms rising into darkness and thinks, maybe she does have the French. Machinerie, diablerie, éminence grise. Grand Guignol.

Sisyphus

One night, while Pluto sleeps with his eyes open, somebody walks past Cerberus into the underworld: a little prince to see a king.

Sisyphus doesn’t hear the tiny record-scratch voice, but when he trudges back to the bottom, there’s a bumpy green-and-yellow ball there instead of his rock. He tries to roll it up the hill. Instead, he rolls up the hill.

Sisyphus rolls up souls and pomegranate trees. He rolls up Charon and, soon after, the Acheron itself. He rolls and laughs, free and wild, while under him the katamari trembles with the heartbeat of a star.

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