When you’re going through a rough time, there’s always someone else who is or has gone through a worse situation. Today Dana and I had lunch with our friend Sherron, whose son was in a fiery accident and spent over a 100 days in a burn unit before he expired. She told me she asked God, “Why my son?” and the answer she received was, “Why not yours?”
Archive for the ‘Dana’ Category
Don’t ask why
Wednesday, April 13th, 2005At times like this
Tuesday, April 12th, 2005My wife Dana and I want to thank each of you—individually, in person, if we could—for your many messages of support. For now, please know that they are much appreciated.
Bruce was able to sit up and talk on Friday, but seemed tired on Saturday. Since we’d arrived in Indianapolis the previous Saturday with clothes for only two days, we needed to get home. We got back to Danville late Saturday, but didn’t get much sleep that night.
Since we hadn’t seen Marty during his spring break, we took him out for dinner on Sunday. During the meal we got the call that Bruce was failing (high temperature, growing infection, pneumonia out of control). We packed up and headed back to Indy. The message we’d received was so alarming that Marty and his mom Terie came with us, despite the fact that school would be back in session on Monday. This time we grabbed our dog, too.
Bruce was stable by the time we arrived, back on a ventilator, but blood pressure and pulse were erratic. By early afternoon, he was resting fairly well and went into surgery to remove a temporary stint (a possible source of the continuing infection) that is used for dialysis, and replace it with a different type. A permanent fistula was considered, but it was decided that he’s too ill to go under anesthesia.
He was sleeping comfortably last night with better vital signs. He’s still under heavy sedation, but he does react to his mother’s voice and can respond to questions with a slight nod. He’s receiving nutrition through a nose tube that goes directly into the small intestine, bypassing the stomach and pancreas. His nurse told Dana that patients with pancreatitis this severe sometimes remain in the ICU three months or more and in the hospital for months longer–a true test of endurance. Regular drives back and forth to Indiana will seem easy by comparison. On Sunday I got to talk to a friend who reminded me that a local acquaintance spent six months in the hospital with pancreatitis, and that it was two years before he was totally his old self. Bruce has the will to undergo a long recuperation if his situation can just stabilize, but I honestly don’t know if his mate has the stamina for what lies ahead.
It is at times like this that Dana and I are reminded how much we value our family (powerful, quiet support) and our friends (an amazing outpouring of affection).
We’re truly grateful for the positive thoughts and prayers. We’ll need them for some time to come…
(Dana helped with this entry.)
Buffalo man, won’t you come out tonight
Monday, April 11th, 2005As we hold our vigil, I’m reminding myself of some hilarious things Bruce said during his interlude off the ventilator.
Paraphrasing… “I was in The Wild Wild West and fighting James West and he took all my money. I was running a railroad and there was the train and everything, but throughout it all I was this huge buffalo. I knew it wasn’t happening, but it was layered over this reality. Then my Dad came to visit me, and I was talking to him, but I was still a huge buffalo… John, I could never begin to catalog all the strange dreams and images, but I can tell you that I definitely gave birth to a ferret.”
As his wife Pam said, “I want some of whatever he was on.”
– – –
p s ~ Happy Birthday, Dana. I pray that you get your wish.
September, 1997
Tuesday, March 29th, 2005I was just thinking back to a Labor Day weekend, seven and a half years ago. I’d just completed an annual event called the “Pound & Pedal” (which has a bit of a reputation in Central Kentucky), and was faced with a trivial choice: should I stick around to enjoy the post-race festivities or go home with my wife Dana?
Permit me to back up a little. In the P&P, two partners compete with other teams by alternating running and cycling— four five-mile legs for a race total of 20 miles. It’s fun if you get in shape for it. The guy who starts out on the bike drops it at the five-mile mark for his teammate, who picks it up and cranks it to the half-way point before his running cohort arrives. It works out best to have the stronger athlete start out on foot (similar to one of those mathematical story problems on an IQ test). With the exertion behind us for the day, my chum Roger had the blender fired up for the cactus juice, and the hot tub was being uncovered.
It was just about that time when we got the phone call. Bruce was going immediately into surgery. A matching kidney had become available. He’d made the nontrivial choice of accepting the sudden donation.
We dropped what we were doing and headed toward Lexington, with the full realization that another decision even more intense had been made at the same time. We found out later that the parents of a 13-year-old child (who’d reached the end of a life that was undeniably too short) had just given the difficult go-ahead to the ever-waiting organ harvesters…
Various & Sundry, part twelve
Friday, March 25th, 2005— I woke up this morning with a distinct phrase in my mind: magnesium fusion triggers. Look, I don’t drive the thing. I’m just ridin’ shotgun…
— Marty called last night and we talked about a subject that’s totally captured his excitement, the new Sony PS Portable. Hey, you’re allowed to get excited about something like this when you’re thirteen. For me, at that age, it was probably Art Linkletter’s “The Game of Life,” or something like that. However, I can’t help but think of this quote from Ben Stein: “I tremble for the day that the next generation has to provide for themselves with what they have learned from their video games.” Relax, Ben. They’ve probably learned more than I ever learned from watching too many hours of “The Avengers,” “The Prisoner,” “Hawaii Five-0” and “The Man from U.N.C.L.E.”
— From what I can discern through the Associated Press, Josh and his 623rd Field Artillery unit was with the convoy that came under attack on Sunday morning, but it stayed with the trucks during the battle and sustained no casualties (from a Bruce Schreiner byline story).
— The new brochure we created for the Brass Band Festival is a major hit, according to our friend who’s retiring as director of the Visitor’s Bureau. I told her I hoped our work makes a good impression with her successor. She said she thought it would and will put in a good word for us. Sounds promising, but the new person brings strong connections to her former employer, a previous client of ours turned competitor. All I can do is stay positive and make my case at the appropriate time. I’d insert a link to the Festival, but the site is just too ugly. Wait a second! This is a job for Website Makeover™ Man!
— Dana and I are heading back up to Indy today to check on Bruce. Normally I have my Rotary Club meeting, but we’re dismissed for Good Friday, so we’ll deal with any urgent matters in the studio and then hit the road before it gets too late.
— I decided to google for “magnesium fusion triggers” and found myself reading an overview at GlobalSecurity.org about special weapons facilities on the Indian subcontinent. OK, so what am I supposed to be more scared of, the metastasis of the World Wide Web, unchecked nuclear proliferation in South Asia, or my own dadburn subconscious?
Political passion trumps good manners once again
Wednesday, March 23rd, 2005Bruce has experienced the medical turnaround that he needed. Somebody’s been praying out there, and you know who you are! His wife, mother, and sister have been at his side, with so many others close to him in spirit. Today’s news is so much better than it’s been since Monday. Although I’m sure it was nothing compared to Dana’s ordeal, yesterday was a rather exhausting day for me emotionally, and not made any better by someone who called to ask about Bruce, and then, when the subject turned to my nephew Josh’s situation, launched into a scathing denunciation of the President of the United States and his Iraq policy. Even if I’d had the inclination or energy to disagree (which I certainly did not), what could I possibly have said to affect an opinion impervious to what others have already stated so ably in support of winning the war… others more influential than me, such as John McCain or Joe Lieberman; or more intellectually gifted than me, such as Jonah Goldberg or Christopher Hitchens; or more deeply thoughtful than me, such as Tom Friedman or Ben Stein? And for cryin’ out loud, it just wasn’t a decent time to kick-start that old debate.
Two Clansmen in harm’s way
Monday, March 21st, 2005Fully absorbed most of the day in the Salvation Army Advisory Board retreat— new member orientation, committee meetings, and strategic planning. When I got home I found out that Bruce has an inflamed pancreas and continues to be critically ill. Dana and daughter Terie (Marty’s mom) will head back to Indy in the morning. Somehow I’ll force myself to concentrate on client commitments and hold the fort in the studio while keeping our son in my thoughts and prayers.
Meanwhile, news arrives that nephew Josh has lost a brother in arms on an escort mission…
My razza-ma-taz miasma
Sunday, March 20th, 2005The past 36 hours have been exhilarating, frustrating, profound, hectic, gratifying, aggravating, sublime, surreal… A trip to Indianapolis to be there for my stepson Bruce, hospitalized with the potential loss of his transplanted kidney, and at the same time provide support for his wife Pam, and at the same time take my grandson Marty to the “INDY 2005” Toy Soldier Show (one of our annual highlights of quality time together, sharing our passion for vintage plastic figures), and at the same time deal with all the monumentally exasperating aspects of a healthcare system run amok, stripped of all idealistic illusions as a result of far too many behind-the-scenes absurdities and ugly exposures of egoism… and at the center of it all, my calm, sweet mate… strong, loving, and wise.
Various & Sundry, part ten
Saturday, March 12th, 2005— We had no business doing it, but we purchased a DVD recorder for our TV/cable configuration at home. Dana’s testing it out today. My question is this: If I’m supposed to transfer my entire collection of Mission: Impossible from VHS to DVD in order to save space, does that mean I get to watch all of it during the dubbing?
— Last night Dana and I made pizza, opened a bottle of Australian Merlot (Black Swan), and celebrated 27 years since our first date. Positioned precisely six months across the calendar from our wedding anniversary, this special observation enables us to have two celebrations each year that honor our enduring partnership in all things.
— After hearing a remark by Charles Murray that the movie Groundhog Day is an “Aristotlelian moral fable” of profound significance that will stand the test of time as a great work of art, Dana and I watched it again and enjoyed it enormously. Yes, I’m aware that among some people, Murray (no relation to Bill) has a negative reputation (unfair, in my opinion), but how can a guy who lists P.J. O’Rourke and James Clavell among his favorites be all bad?
For all those forunate enough to read this
Friday, March 11th, 2005I can never explain exactly how these odd exercises get started, but it germinated while Dana and I were watching C-SPAN during breakfast. It took root in the shower and before long I was compelled to complete my list.
— — —
THE 30 MOST INFLUENTIAL MEDIA INNOVATORS OF MY LIFETIME
Edward R. Murrow, Ted Turner, Brian Lamb, Rush Limbaugh, Rupert Murdoch
Ronald Reagan, Don Hewitt, Steve Allen, Ben Bradlee, Matt Drudge
Oprah Winfrey, Roone Arledge, Jack Anderson, Phil Donahue, Johnny Carson
Woodward/Bernstein, Garrison Keillor, Huntley/Brinkley, Lorne Michaels, Lucille Ball/Desi Arnez
Tom Wolfe, Barbara Walters, Walter Chronkite, Al Neuharth, MacNeil/Lehrer
Mike Royko, Jeff McNelly, Bob Edwards, Charles Schultz, Norman Lear
— — —
For reasons I can’t explain to myself, I’ve left out the world of cinema, music, theater, and pure entertainment (the full spectrum of mass media). There seemed a need to have an overall public affairs orientation to it. Each figure meets the requirement of both influence and innovation, although some are weighted more to one than the other. Yes, it gets shakier and more subjective as I move down the list, and I’d be interested in the opinion of others. It wouldn’t be that hard to expand it to 50 names, to find room for many others worthy of consideration, such as: Jacques Cousteau, Ken Burns, Jann Wenner, Clay Felker, Charles Kuralt, Jim Henson, Paul Conrad, Malcolm Forbes, Daniel Shore, and Roger Mudd, etc., etc.
What do you think? Did I neglect the obvious? Who would you strike? Who would you add?
If you like this kind of history-of-mass-media material you’ll like the cybernewseum.
Damn. Some people probably get paid for thinking up stuff like this.
! ! !
Please leave it to the professionals
Wednesday, February 23rd, 2005I burned out on “reality TV” back when it was invented by Allen Funt, who hid a camera and caught people “in the act of being themselves.” I guess there was a certain authenticity to the captured behaviors, but weren’t the scenarios contrived to produce humor in the first place? Dana observed tonight that the pervasive garbage produced today to create an illusion of authenticity isn’t “reality” at all, but rather people in the vicinity of not-so-hidden cameras “trying to act the way they think they should act, when they can’t act.”
Various & Sundry, part six
Monday, February 14th, 2005— Since last week, Dana and I’ve been so tied up preparing for tomorrow’s major presentation that we reluctantly acknowledged to each other over coffee this morning that Valentine’s Day would surely slip away without adequate observation. Million Dollar Baby will have to wait.
— Some guy was on the tube today lambasting authors who come up with another gimmick just to get their diet book on the New York Times best seller list. What was he promoting? A new book about diets that will probably get on the best seller list.
— When our friends Jeannette and Betty were in D.C. for the inauguration, they had a chance to get a picture taken with Ben Stein at one of the gala events. They loaned me the snapshot to scan for them and I think my smile, while sitting here doing the favor, is as big as theirs in the photo. It would be so cool to meet Ben and then score a picture with him in his tuxedo. He has to be one of the most desirable media personalities a non-celebrity could hope to encounter. There’s nothing about Ben not to like, and he genuinely appreciates people. I became convinced of that when I read excerpts from his diary. Anyone who likes to document life’s ordinary experiences can learn so much from how Ben does it. Someday his journals will undoubtedly become one of the most valuable accounts of contemporary American life produced at the turn of the century. He has an extraordinary insight into what makes the world go round. It’s never too late to learn new skills for living, because it’s never too late to screw up your life. There aren’t too many books that everyone should read. Ben’s book is one of them!
Taking to one’s bosom
Thursday, January 27th, 2005I was only half paying attention to a sound bite on TV featuring the new Mrs. Donald Trump, and in some sort of accent she gushed about “all the wonnerful mammaries” associated with her recent wedding. When I told Dana why I was laughing so hard, her reply was, “John, she was saying MEMORIES.”
A visit to the cellar
Monday, January 24th, 2005After the open house for David’s retirement from National City, Dana and I had dinner at Freddie’s with David, Lee, Gary, and Trish. Afterwards we regrouped at the Town House for dessert, so I opened the 1997 bottle of Nichelini Cabernet, which had been waiting patiently for a celebration. My goodness, it was even better than I was expecting. RWB certainly knows his wine. We all enjoyed a welcome break from recent tensions. David asked me to show Gary and Trish my first wood engraving, and so I made my typical awkward attempt at juggling personal pride and sincere humility. You’d think that by now I’d feel more natural when it came to discussing my art.