Category: People

December 13, 2003 /

Emily Anderson was here for about 24 hours, starting Friday night; she, Maria and I made pancakes, watched movies, and generally mocked my sexuality. A good time was had, mostly. (They made me wear a pink fuzzy hat and sunglasses. They called me “Elton.”)

Seriously, it was really good to see her, and we did have enormous fun. I found out I’m a deity of some sort, I guess: this morning Maria was unhappy about the gloomy no-fun weather outside, so she turned to me for help.

“Brendan,” she complained, “make it snow!”

I turned in the direction of the balcony and ordered, in as grand a tone as I could produce, “Snow.”

It started five minutes later. I’m not really sure how to turn it off.

December 11, 2003 /

Sumana sent me pretty cool article.

“Louisville Christians are demonstrating that the Church is indeed one. Predominately black Forest Baptist Church has joined predominately white Highland Baptist Church in commemorating those killed by violence in the Louisville area during the past year. Church members drive white crosses into the ground outside their churches equal to the number killed during the past twelve months….”

Times like this, I like to remember my city’s motto.

Louisville: Hey, we’re not Cincinnati.

You want to know about Ben McBrayer?

December 10, 2003 /

I’ll tell you about Ben McBrayer.

When I was a pre-preschool-age kid in Georgetown, a bunch of moms (mine included) somehow ended up putting their children in a play group together. It would later turn out that (me excepted) the group was composed entirely of future geniuses, but that’s an entry for another time. One of the kids in that group was Ben McBrayer, and so we were friends from literally before I can remember.

The McBrayers moved to Hawaii for a while, then back to Kentucky–to Richmond, by strange coincidence, where the Adkinses had moved in the meantime. We went to middle school together, hung out less in high school, lost track except for holiday stuff in college, and then after a long time I saw him again at my mother’s wedding. He’s also in grad school, it turns out, pursuing a MFA-or-maybe-PhD in music history at Cincinnati.

The thing about Ben McBrayer is that he tends to like the same things that I like, only he likes them ten years before I do. I feel like I’m constantly growing up to be Ben McBrayer, and by the time I do, he’s already an even more advanced scholar / critic / artisan. If I’m ever cool enough to be a rock star, Ben McBrayer will be so cool he’ll be dead.

This is the perfect example: Ben McBrayer and I used to draw comic books together in Georgetown. Our chief focus was on a group called The Challengers, with a roster that included Cat-Man, Slasher and The Pilot (Cat-Man is still probably my favorite superhero). It was fun, standard kid stuff.

When Ben McBrayer moved back from Hawaii, we were in sixth grade, and I was pretty excited about getting to draw The Challengers with him again. When I broached the subject, Ben McBrayer got a sage and faraway look in his eyes, and said “Oh, yeah, that? Sure, we could draw that again. As kind of a satire.”

And that’s what it is about Ben McBrayer.

December 7, 2003 /
  • context: I am an experienced console and PC gamer with many hours of practice under my belt
  • found Liero via game god Kevan
  • liked it immediately
  • played a quick few rounds with Maria
  • hate Maria
  • taking my toys, going home

December 5, 2003 /

Do you, like any right-minded American, often find yourself daydreaming of the near-erotic qualities of homemade confectionery? Do you loathe the undead? In an attack simulation, would you be one of the fork-wielding souls who turned to spit your fury full in the gibbering face of the forces of Baron Samedi?

Hi, I’m Brendan Adkins. You may remember me from such films as Mission: Implausible and Pirate Isle 4: Rhinobreath’s Revenge. I’m here today to let you in on an exclusive opportunity, available for a limited time only: the chance to join your kindred spirits, the righteous and the hungry, in Zomziepie.

The benefits of the community are many. You’ll be able to pool your own zombie-combat wisdom with that of other experienced veterans, and you’ll have the privilege of sneak peeks at new and adventurous pie recipes. You’ll gain access to our 24-hour-a-day global database of undead activity, which you can conveniently check from the comfort of your pastry kitchen. In addition, with your membership dues, you’ll receive

  • nothing

And much more. The choice is clear: Zomziepie is the interweb’s hot spot for these rapidly converging fields. Get in on the ground floor–call today!

I’m Brendan Adkins.

December 4, 2003 /

I lived through my exams, and I did get an A in the other class, so BAM: school is done for Brendan. This is still weird! I don’t have classes for like a month!

In case you’re still in classes and are wondering if that was intended to make you hate me: yes. Also, “[redacted].” (Hey, [redacted]! Get a blog!)

November 30, 2003 /

I experienced a surreal and Sumanaesque moment upon the sudden realization, tonight, that I have a LiveJournal! No, wait. I knew that. Stephen gave it to me. What was surreal was planning to set up another account, with the aim of syndicating NFD, and then discovering that a certain kind somebody had already done so!

LiveJournal: A neverending font of generosity. If you’re Brendan.

November 30, 2003 /

I really hate remedy medicine. I actually don’t like taking drugs at all, though I make mild use of caffeine and will choke down / vaporize / intravene something if, you know, I’ll die otherwise. But decongestants, antihystamines, painkillers, soporifics… bleagh. I don’t like to think about treating symptoms instead of causes. I can live with symptoms! Fix the root problem!

Nevertheless, living with an iron-willed roommate who happens to be a med student will eventually weaken you on the placebo-effect front. I’ve been taking Robitussin for about 24 hours now, which is why I was functional enough to sit in a VERY COLD ticket booth and run sound for PI Sketch with only one slip-up. It was a good show. The crowd liked it. I touched Yale inappropriately and got to meet Allilea, who differs from most other celebrities in that she’s taller in real life.

Tomorrow I crash hard, and try to get ready for my last homework and last exam on Tuesday. Then Thursday, then finals, and then the semester will be over. This is very weird. Who the hell gets out for finals on December 4th? U of L, that’s who.

Yea, I go to bed to rest my fevered brow, and to cough until the Robitussin kicks in. It’s not like this is unusual, I get sick about once every winter, but I start to worry about my brain health when I notice that I’m subtracting 230 from 1830 and coming up with 1400.

November 29, 2003 /

I normally don’t much like shopping the day after Thanksgiving, not so much because I mind crowds as because it’s the day Everybody’s Supposed To Go Shopping and I don’t like being manipulated by faceless corporations to engage in something that really shouldn’t involve faceless corporations so much.

As Maria and I did not previously own apartment-decorating paraphernalia, though, and as it was on sale, we went forth to Target and bought a horrifying amount of stuff, including a five-foot-or-something artificial tree (previous trees in my [non-Richmond] places of residence basically included Jon’s eighteen-inch tree, decorated with a Centre Debate 2000 button) and ordaments. We spent a LOT, just about everything I saved off the food budget this month by feeding my sister ramen noodles.

But we have shiny things now. And it’s snowing!

November 27, 2003 /

The band was okay–nice people, just the Motown they usually picked to play was not slow enough to slow dance and not fast enough to fast dance. They did get everybody out on the floor, though, for “Brown-Eyed Girl.” My mom’s song.

I saw Ben McBrayer, whom I’ve been meaning to write, and a million people whose names I didn’t know I remembered. I was terrified I’d read my Corinthians too fast, but a lot of people complimented me on that, and on how much I look like my dad. Instead of best man and maid of honor, they had Best Moms–my grandmother Virginia and my new grandmother Betty Jo. Father Pat started to prompt them, but they already knew the vows by heart.

Maria was kind enough to drive down from Louisville to get me last night, and I’ve spent Thanksgiving with her family today; Ian’s at Noah’s and Caitlan is at our family farm. This week was the only chance they’ll have for a break together before Christmas. I don’t know how they managed to pull this whole thing off in six weeks, but it was…

About halfway through the service, one of the light bulbs right above the front row chose November 26th as its day to expire. Nobody noticed: my mother and stepfather were glowing.