I found this thread about messing up your child’s vocabulary a while ago, but I guess I never posted it. I think it’s great, because a) it uses the word “xorph” and b) I plan to do that stuff to my kids all the time.
Well, actually I plan to do that stuff to Jon and Amanda’s kids first. If necessary, I will create props.
| Small Brasfield: | Mommy, can we go to the store and get some more Super Snot? We used it all. |
| Amanda: | Get some more what? |
| Small Brasfield: | Super Snot! The stuff you use to stick things together. |
| Jon: | You mean glue? |
| Small Brasfield: | Uncle Brendan told me it’s really called Super Snot! He showed me in a book. |
| Amanda: | Okay, listen carefully. From now on you can’t trust books Uncle Brendan gives you. Okay? |
| Small Brasfield: | I can’t trust the Bible? |
| Amanda: | (begins smoking from her ears) |
| Jon: | Wait. How did you use up all your Sup–your glue? |
| Small Brasfield: | Uncle Brendan showed me how to make Smaller Brasfield’s hair look really cool! |
After that, Jon and Amanda should have the messing-up-my-kids part well in hand.